Life in the midst of grief

In the midst of grief life goes on. I didn't know how this was possible. When Jack first passed it seemed crazy to me that the world was still spinning. It was crazy to think about the rest of the world going on as usual. I suppose I thought things should stand still, at least for a little while. Now I see. Now I see that you can't stop life even after you feel as though the pain should literally kill you. Life doesn't work that way. The nature of life itself can't stop until the Master commands it. Now I understand. I've understood for a while now, but its taken time. I was watching the kids play in the yard the other day and it was so beautiful! The day was beautiful, the children were intoxicating with their laughter and play. I sat there thinking about how sad and happy I was feeling all at the same time. I realized I could do both. Sadness doesn't mean your life has to stop. It can't and won't! All the while there's too much life and blessings to enjoy. Tomorrow we'll be having a birthday party for my baby Clayton, my sweet girl Emma, and her half brother David. These sweet lives deserve all that I have to offer. I've realized that I won't ever quit missing Jack. While the sadness isn't as suffocating, its still there, but it doesn't have to stop me from enjoying the lives I have left to celebrate and cherish. God is so good.I can't imagine my life without Him. I know I wouldn't be seeing the clouds part at all without Him. Happy birthday Emma, Clayton, and David, I love you babies!